Tuesday, 18 February 2014

Signs you're being taken for granted

Very often most of us feel that we're taken for granted - it's really hard to find the line when it comes to any relationships be it love or friendships.

Give too little and people may assume you don't care..... give too much and people may get used to it and only start expecting you to drop everything or do everything when they need you.

I'm not saying that everyone takes their partners / friends / family for granted. I can only imagine there's people out there like me, you want to make people you care about very happy and you do that often enough but buying them gifts, buying them pretty much whatever they want..... overtime, these gestures may become expectations.

Imagine buying lavish gifts for a partner for 5 years in a row, and on the 6th year, you give your partner a card, imagine how they would feel about that, when the expectation has been set (probably subconsciously)

in my opinion, these are signs that your partner is taking you for granted.... and of course these rules apply to me:

1) They just don't have time for you. Who cares if you put in time to plan something 3 weeks in advance. If something comes up, you will have to drop it and you will probably be willing to but if tables turned, you had better drop everything for them.

2) They tend to forget to be in touch - now this is debatable as i am the sort who likes being in touch with my partner in ridiculous amounts, but for all your normal folks reading this, i think a partner who forgets to be in touch or forgets to reply, clearly is taking you for granted. come on - no one IS THAT BUSY!

3) they are very impatient with you - simply because you are taking too long to understand their point of view but sometimes in moments like these, when situations arise, people may try and explain themselves in very confusing way, heightening the patience level of both parties trying to understand each other.

4) they will never say they are in the wrong. they will probably tell you white lies to prove they are right.

5) you know you deserve better. - i really don't need to explain this do i? fine, sometimes the worse thing to do is to over think everything and think you deserve better - but if you're feeling that way 90% of the time, it's definitely not going to work in the long run.

i think the list goes on - but i think if you feel the need to verbalise in your head and heart that you're being taken for granted, then you probably are. it is ultimately a vicious cycle, you start to think you need to do more so that they will love you more, however then they start expecting more and this really just never ends.

it's easy to feel defeated. maybe a chat with your loved one is the only way to go

I am no relationship expert - in fact i am in no position to even be talking about this (because of how many failed relationships I've been) however I'm just verbalising thoughts. and I'm sure there are people out there who agree with me

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